Crossfit

Single ladies, I've got a huge tip for ya. If you want to meet good looking single men, join crossfit... or just mention the word crossfit next time you're in a crowded bar and I guarantee you'll have their attention.


Maybe stick with mentioning it in a bar because I tried the workout for the first time on Monday, and I am still having a hard time completing basic human functionality. Oh and it's Wednesday.

Nicknames

One of the most therapeutic steps in dealing with any break up is to give the bastard a nickname.  Trust me it helps. My step-mom taught me about this process when I was in Junior High and ever since, I've nicknamed all the jerks I've dated except one.  Still working on that one.

OMG Im a cougar!

... and Im attracted to professional deep sea divers. Period.

A Stranger's Strange Advice

A single serving friend I met on a plane coming home from Vegas once told me to never trust a man who updates his facebook status. Point taken.

The perfect man.

Dealbreaker # 4

You're shorter than 6'3.

Sorry, but if my daughter has any chance at getting a full ride volleyball scholarship to UW, then these rules must apply.

This time next week...

I'll be in Vegas.  Which reminds me of a pretty ridiculous pick-up line my friend was fed the last time we were in NV.

"You look like my first wife and I've never been married." - Some creepster.

Quality over Quantity

I've decided to not waste any more of my time dating/canoodling men that I am not actually interested in having a relationship with. Even if they are extremely good looking and offer me hotdogs and massages, I will not give in to anything less than a twisted sense of humor and good conversation.

Dealbreaker #3

You're weak!  I could totally kick your ass in arm wrestling, or just in general.

How could I say no?

A mildly attractive massage school student, who I am not interested in, asked me if I would let him buy me a hotdog some time this week.  Ummm... How could I say no to hotdogs and massages?

Note to self:

Do not do any of these dances with a guy that you do not want to kiss you.

Running Man

Cabbage Patch

Tango

;)

Dating is so much more difficult in the world of text/instant messaging.  It is so hard to decipher and interpret the meaning of winky, smiley, and cat faces.

Guys, lemme save you some time.  If you're into it, send me one of these   ~~~,~~'~~{@

This ;^) wont get you anywhere!